just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
