i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
