It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
did you just send me my own nude
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
