i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Randomize
