Dual....:-)
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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