talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
