I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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