4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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