Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize