part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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