Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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