I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize