Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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