So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Are we still banned from the library?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
