two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
