How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
