Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I just forgot I was standing up.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
