the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
