Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize