the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
