Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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