She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
