Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
The feeling are messing with the penis
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Two words: blizzard sex
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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