if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
