I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
