well I can't set my house on fire every night
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I need to calm my uterus...
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize