TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
