Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Ladies don't puke and tell
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
