I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
