I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Randomize
