Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
another moral hangover. fuck.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize