What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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