This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
