How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
