I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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