I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
