dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
