I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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