so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
