he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
