No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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