i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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