I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
