she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize