Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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