so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize
