I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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