I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
