do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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