youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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