HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize